The Wednesday before Christmas was my first day of my Christmas holidays from work. I was sitting at home in the kitchen eating my lunch and looking out the window into the garden. It was so beautiful and so cold. It looked like it had been snowing but of course, as you know, the frost had been so severe that most of Ireland looked like it had been buried beneath a blanket of snow. The I noticed the birds where in the frozen grass and they desperately trying to dig down for worms and sure the ground was frozen solid. And then it happened. Bang came the pang of guilt.
I watched them for a while as they desperately tried to get something to eat so I eventually gave in and took some bread from the press, ripped it up and threw it on the path at the rear of the house. I then went off to the shop to get myself a hot chicken roll from the deli counter as I was just totally starved, just like the birds! I was only gone for five minutes and when I got back all the bread had been eaten and the smaller birds were now around looking for crumbs. Sure god love em like. I had done something but it wasn't enough.
I decided I'd go back down to the shop and buy one of them bird feeder things that you hang from the tree. It cost €2.40 or thereabouts. I then had to buy a bag of nuts for the birds which cost around €13! Now don't get me wrong, I wanted to feed the birds till they got over this frozen spell but €13 was a bit steep. Anyway I stumped up the cash and trotted home merrily in the knowledge that the poor lil birdies would now be fed till the ground softens so they can pick out the worms or whatever else they eat!
Well I filled up the bird feeder and hung it on the tree. Now it was dusk as I did this so it'd be the morning before they got a chance to taste the delights that awaited them on my tree. When I got up the following morning the tree was bursting with birds and they were munching uncontrollably through the nuts. I was going to shoo them away cos I didn't want them to get fat but then I thought to myself that maybe they were really hungry after the past few days so I let them to it.
I had to fill it up again the next day. And the next day. And the next. These birds were starting to annoy me. How greedy can they be? And it's not as if I even like them feathered things. I'm actually petrified of em. If one flew near me I would actually die. Like actually die! My heart races when they are on the footpath near me. But I'd hate to see them hungry and suffering. See aren't I just a softy?
Well lads, I got up yesterday morning and the bird feeder was lying flat on the ground and they were literally gobbing food into them. So out I went in my pyjamas and shooed em away and I went to put it back up on the tree. And wouldn't you know they had gone and broken it. Out with the glue and I glued it up and then I stuck it back up on the tree. Got up this morning and they had knocked it off again.
These birds are really testing my patience. See at first I thought that they'd be starving and could do with some lovely food to keep them alive. But oh no, they like need food, and lots of it, everyday. AND it's costing me a small fortune to keep them in food.
What started out as me being the good Samaritan is now going to result in me being a hard and cruel b*stard! Anyone see my shotgun? Joke.
I watched them for a while as they desperately tried to get something to eat so I eventually gave in and took some bread from the press, ripped it up and threw it on the path at the rear of the house. I then went off to the shop to get myself a hot chicken roll from the deli counter as I was just totally starved, just like the birds! I was only gone for five minutes and when I got back all the bread had been eaten and the smaller birds were now around looking for crumbs. Sure god love em like. I had done something but it wasn't enough.
I decided I'd go back down to the shop and buy one of them bird feeder things that you hang from the tree. It cost €2.40 or thereabouts. I then had to buy a bag of nuts for the birds which cost around €13! Now don't get me wrong, I wanted to feed the birds till they got over this frozen spell but €13 was a bit steep. Anyway I stumped up the cash and trotted home merrily in the knowledge that the poor lil birdies would now be fed till the ground softens so they can pick out the worms or whatever else they eat!
Well I filled up the bird feeder and hung it on the tree. Now it was dusk as I did this so it'd be the morning before they got a chance to taste the delights that awaited them on my tree. When I got up the following morning the tree was bursting with birds and they were munching uncontrollably through the nuts. I was going to shoo them away cos I didn't want them to get fat but then I thought to myself that maybe they were really hungry after the past few days so I let them to it.
I had to fill it up again the next day. And the next day. And the next. These birds were starting to annoy me. How greedy can they be? And it's not as if I even like them feathered things. I'm actually petrified of em. If one flew near me I would actually die. Like actually die! My heart races when they are on the footpath near me. But I'd hate to see them hungry and suffering. See aren't I just a softy?
Well lads, I got up yesterday morning and the bird feeder was lying flat on the ground and they were literally gobbing food into them. So out I went in my pyjamas and shooed em away and I went to put it back up on the tree. And wouldn't you know they had gone and broken it. Out with the glue and I glued it up and then I stuck it back up on the tree. Got up this morning and they had knocked it off again.
These birds are really testing my patience. See at first I thought that they'd be starving and could do with some lovely food to keep them alive. But oh no, they like need food, and lots of it, everyday. AND it's costing me a small fortune to keep them in food.
What started out as me being the good Samaritan is now going to result in me being a hard and cruel b*stard! Anyone see my shotgun? Joke.
5 comments:
In the summer I feededed the birdies yummy bacon! They love me!
Well I hope you left water for them cos they will be ever so thirst after the bacon! haha
I've been reading your blog for a while now but I don't think I've ever commented. Just had to let you know that this post made me laugh out loud for quite a long time! I'd be exactly the same, myself - it's just nice to see that I'm not the only one who's a soft eejit, to my own disadvantage. :)
Well Hails! Welcome to "le blog"!
Yes, we are soft eejits. But I got an overwhelming warm and fuzzy feeling when I came home from work today and found the birds waiting for me to fill up their feeder. Although I was afraid that they were going to attack me if I didn't feed them.
So it's all worth while. Or is it?
Now's your chance for revenge... several well fed birds would go really nicely into a stew, saves you walkin' down town again to buy dinner!
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